Last week I discussed how changes in America’s understanding of gender contributed heavily to a federal judges ability to overturn California’s proposition to define marriage as being between a man and a woman. This week I want to move to a discussion on how divorce has also contributed.
The word divorce shows up 25 times in the ruling document, which is a little ironic seeing as how it is a ruling on marriage. Some quotes:
“Blankenhorn identified changes [in the institution of marriage] that to him signify the deinstitutionalization of marriage, including an increase in births outside of marriage and an increasing divorce rate.” (14)
“Blankenhorn identified several manifestations of deinstitutionalization: out-of-wedlock childbearing, rising divorce rates, the rise of non-marital cohabitation, increasing use of assistive reproductive technologies and marriage for same-sex couples.” (45)
“The development of no-fault divorce laws made it simpler for spouses to end marriages...” (64)
Before I begin much commentary let me say that divorce is a difficult subject in the Bible. Many Christians have differing views on when it is permissible and whether or not remarriage can occur. But let me be clear, divorce is a horrific but not unpardonable sin. I also realize that there are so many different stories of how divorce occurred, many of which amount to one person having no choice in the matter, I do not place blame on those people for being victimized in this way.
There is no question that divorce is prevalent in our society. It is not merely a fact of life, it is a lucrative business. Some have divorce parties, some go for the “quick and painless” route, while others acknowledge it as a probability by creating a document to protect their things in case they can’t protect their marriage.
As one who is getting married in just under a month, I’m terrified of divorce. I hate everything about it. A 0.111111% chance that I could end up divorced is too much for me to handle. In my mind it’s not an option, but I have heard enough stories to know that I have to fight for my marriage from the first day.
I think the liberal side of the so-called “homosexual marriage” debate is correct when they say that the institution of marriage is under as much attack by straight people than it is by homosexuals. Homosexuals didn’t create no-fault divorce, they haven’t forced us to divorce, and they certainly aren’t responsible for the fact that those who claim Christianity get divorced at nearly the same rate as everyone else. That’s on us. It doesn’t make so-called “homosexual marriage” right, it just makes their case look better.
So, like last week, allow me to give some biblical points on marriage and divorce to encourage you to hate it as much as our Lord does:
God created the institution of marriage.
"Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male
and female, and said, 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'?” (Matthew 19:4-5)
Divorce is the enemy of God’s purpose for marriage, namely, the display of the gospel in the relationship between husband and wife.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for
her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.” (Ephesians 5:25-27)
God has very harsh things to say about divorce.
“For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the LORD,the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the LORD of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.” (Malachi 2:16)
What do these texts tell us? I believe they tell us that God created marriage with an explicit purpose- one that cannot be fulfilled by so-called “homosexual marriage”- and that the act of divorce works against that purpose. Notice the harshness of the words in the last text I cited from Malachi. Many will look at this as being merely a hatred of an act, but we must accept the complex fact that God sees a man who has just divorced his wife like O.J. Simpson running from a crime scene. It’s not clean, it’s messy, and it’s selfish.
Thankfully there is another thing that God has to say to those who are divorced:
“My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may
not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. He is the propitiation for our sins…” (1 John
2:1-2a)
These things should encourage us to hate divorce but if you have been divorced you are still not beyond the reach of Christ’s love and grace. As unrighteous as we are Christ is still more righteous. So trust him, love his gospel, and love the display of the gospel that is biblical marriage.
Grace and Peace…
Cordially,
Stephen A. Bean
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